Getting Past Your Breakup

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Susan J. Elliott is a best-selling author, lawyer, grief counselor, divorce coach, podcaster, motivational speaker, and media commentator. She is the host of the podcast Mean Lady Talking. She's written a book about her approach for dealing with separation and divorce.

It is often highly beneficial to go through a breakup in the long run. Consider the situation an opportunity to take an honest look at your life rather than ignoring it or reacting self-destructively. Also, learn how to be satisfied with yourself before getting involved in a new relationship. Get involved in an activity you enjoy. You may find it helpful to preoccupy yourself after a breakup with something simple that won't push you too hard. For example, to cope with the shock and distract yourself, consider learning how to knit or build things.

"If you listen carefully and look closely, usually your choice of mates will tell you what you need to know about yourself."

"Time does not heal all wounds. If it did, there would be no unresolved grief and no hurt from long ago that still upsets you from time to time. Pain that is not faced does not go away."

"When you are not afraid of grief, you will make better choices."

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