Lean Out

Book summary

Marissa Orr has extensive firsthand experience of misguided corporate attempts to close the gender gap – she worked at Google and Facebook for 15 years, all while she was a single mother of three. Here, the tech industry veteran dissects where corporate feminism is failing women and pinpoints what corporations should really be doing to promote equality in the workplace.

Sheryl Sandberg’s “Ban Bossy” campaign highlighted how women are penalized for assertiveness, unlike men, but Marissa Orr critiques this approach, arguing that imitating masculine traits isn’t the solution. Gender stereotypes, shaped by societal norms, create challenges for both sexes, yet Sandberg’s feminism focuses on women adapting to corporate structures rather than dismantling them. The glass ceiling persists not due to a lack of confidence but because systemic issues, like traditional family roles and inadequate maternity leave, remain unaddressed. Women are often advised to suppress “feminine” traits like hesitation or empathy, yet these qualities can signify thoughtfulness and innovation. Corporate culture rewards performative confidence over authentic self-reliance, pushing women to conform rather than redefining success. While women excel academically, corporate success often hinges on subjective perceptions, not merit, disadvantaging them. Power dynamics in the workplace also favor male authority over female influence, despite the latter’s effectiveness. Many women opt out of leadership roles due to disproportionate unpaid domestic work, highlighting the need for better work-life balance rather than urging them to do more. Corporate workshops often teach women to mimic male behavior, but true progress requires systemic change, fostering environments where authenticity thrives. Lessons from Denmark’s organ donation success show that altering systems, not individuals, yields better outcomes. Similarly, corporate networking prioritizes transactional alliances over meaningful relationships, disadvantaging women who value collaboration. Instead of women adapting to flawed systems, men could learn from women’s collaborative, relationship-driven approaches to foster a more inclusive workplace.

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